They call it love life for a reason!

Love is a complicated creature. I call it a creature because that is what it is. I will explain why.

When you first find it, you automatically connect with it.  You get butterflies in the very pit of your stomach at the thought, let alone the sight of the person that is the subject of such feeling.  You cannot connect a train of thought without that person interrupting.  You want to spend as much time with that person, escalating these feelings.  Even a man can multitask when in love, you can simultaneously count the minutes from when you last saw them while at the same time counting the minutes until you see them again.  You want to do everything for them.  You want to be with them, emotionally, physically and spiritually while at the same time screaming your feelings from the roof tops.

Can you name something that is just an emotion that provokes such feeling?  anger, jealousy, confusion and even sadness can pass over you like a wave after a short space of time.  All emotions can be overtaken by your subconscious.  They can be suppressed, transferred or even ignored depending on the person these emotions are affecting.  This cannot be done with love. Love controls you. Love lives and grows within you. You cannot control how it makes you feel and you cannot suppress it.  For this reason they call it a love life, for the duration you experience this feeling is a life cycle.

However, I have recently found the other side to this previously amazing creature I had finally managed to catch and then nurture.  I now see the the side of love.  To explain it visually I can only compare it to the alien which lives within it's host in the Alien films.  You cannot sleep without visualising the person, your appetite dwindles, your concentration is reduced to zero as your thoughts always drift like gravity toward memories and thoughts of that person.  The butterflies which once flew and tickled the lining of your stomach have now become a knot which tightens further with every thought.  You cannot see beyond the next ten minutes and you don't really care if you don't exist at the end of those ten minutes because without that person and those feelings the world and its contents hold no meaning for you. But at the same time you have to stay alive because you still care for that person, you don't want to know what they are doing but regardless of the impact to you it has to make them happy. Thoughts of another person filing your shoes are hurtful but you stay alert as you want them to be happy.

I have never owned so much as a goldfish but I have met, owned, grown and lost the creature called love.  It hurts like hell but glad I did.